Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Real Men Don’t Say These Things

Well, it happened again. I browsed Kindle M/M books, looking for an author I hadn’t discovered, hoping to find a cache of books to get through the holiday travels. Read a few blurbs, then found a seven book series that looked like a good bet. Downloaded the sample on Kindle.
The first couple of pages weren’t bad—I liked the characters. Then all hell broke loose in the form of head hopping. For the next few pages, I persevered—rereading every bit of dialogue to see whose head I was in. Then the onset of the kind of intimate scene I hate. (Names have been changed to protect the innocent):
“Oh, Johnny. Want you. Need you now.”
“Need you too, baby. Now. Right now.”
“Can’t wait, Johnny-cakes. Pleease.”
ME: Johnny-cakes? Seriously? And so forth. I admit. I caved—couldn’t take any more of the free sample. How anyone made it through seven books’ worth is beyond me.
Real men do NOT have these kinds of conversations at work, then seek out a closet.
Accurate male characters in fiction do not act like this. I’ve read enough to be pretty sure on this point. I’ve written enough to know I’d not submit these two characters to an editor.
Sooo…back to the browsing. Hope something appears.
What are your pet peeves in M/M?

Available from MLR Press: Going For Gold
Available from Redhot Publishing: Everything Erotic

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